


Ding Dong

by makotonaegi



Category: Dangan Ronpa
Genre: Gen, Inside jokes, M/M, homosexual undertones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-07
Updated: 2013-09-07
Packaged: 2017-12-25 22:36:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/958394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makotonaegi/pseuds/makotonaegi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hajime has some salesman troubles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ding Dong

The doorbell rung.

And Hajime Hinata was pretty pissed off.

Five times, _five times_ that annoying salesman just seemed to keep coming back to pester him! In spite of Hajime's best efforts at warding the guy off, he seemed to be the most persistent man in the history of all mankind. Maybe in some alternate universe, it could be an incredible feat, but it seriously didn't have to so goddamn ANNOYING.

Ding dong.

“More like... Donkey Kong,” Hajime muttered to no one in particular. In record time, he had a wistful urge to blast the DK Rap out of the window in hopes of warding off the irksome money predator.

Not being exactly the type to have patience with these sort of things, and nearly blowing the salesman's head off last time he came around, our protagonist made the decision to just wait out. _They couldn't be that tenacious, could they?_ he wondered.

Almost as if on cue, the doorbell started ringing nonstop, and it wouldn't stop ringing. The word “ring” had no more meaning, and the mere mentioning of it could possibly be enough to make Hajime want to hop right out of a window.

And so, Hajime had had enough.

Stomping down the stairwell, he stood in front of the front door, shaking with rage. Practically kicking the door open, he snarled to the asshole waiting outside, “What do you WANT!? I've been literally hoping this entire time that you would just go away, because I don't want any rubber nipples! Who do you... think...”

Hajime glances around and realized there seemed to be no one there.

And before cursing out loud about those darn kids, always messing with their ding dong ditch, he knew he'd messed up when he looked down and saw a very frightened Teruteru Hanamura, the chef. Man, why'd this guy have to be so short?

“H... Hinata-kun?” Teruteru stammered. “I-I know my dashing looks could be rage-inducing, but could you please... take it down a notch?”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Hajime sighed and answered, “Sorry, it's been a tough day. But I'll bite... What is it you want, Hanamura? It... better be important.”

Somewhere in his mind, a tiny Hajime was surfboarding and enjoying life, because the salesman was gone, hallelujah!

Of course, Teruteru saw his chance and stood back, clearing his throat...

“Ding dong. Rimjob?” the chef insinuated sensually, pulling out a condom and ringing the doorbell with a smug grin.

In his entire life, Hajime had never slammed a door as hard as he did that day.


End file.
